Thursday, September 18, 2014

Where have I been?

Things went dark around here far too long ago. As many of you may already know, we're expecting a baby this fall. Earlier this year, it was equally hard to keep it a secret and avoid word vomitting about all of the crippling anxiety and fears of being pregnant again after two losses. So it became easier to just say nothing at all. To hold my breath and take it one day at a time, head down and hopes in check.

I'd be lying if I said all of those anxieties have gone away, so I'm not sure I'll ever get to the place where I blog regularly about being pregnant. But it's completley consumed our lives - been the best and most terrifying thing to ever happen to us - so it's not like I'll ignore it all together, either. The bottom line is this: we are feeling so grateful that God has granted us another opportunity to be parents, and we couldn't be more excited to welcome our little baby boy later this year. I will never get tired of feeling him dance around my tummy. I'll also probably never stop worrying about every little thing my body does - wondering if it's normal, if it's anything to be concerned about. I realize the anxieties of carrying a child are only a precursor to what it's like to have a child in this world, their life in your hands. So I suppose this is only just the beginning - the paradoxes of fear and pure joy that make up parenthood. But I wouldn't have it any other way.

So what else have we done these last 5 months, in addition to the minor detail of gestating a child?
  • Celebrated 2 years of marriage
  • Took a vacation with Sean's family to a cabin in Wisconsin (and hit a deer on our drive up there)
  • Had the 5th annual golf tournament in memory of Sean's dad
  • Found we are having a BOY
  • Finished our 10th consecutive season of co-ed softball (I was starting scorekeeper this year)
  • Celebrated my mom's 50th birthday
  • Had a 3D ultrasound of our little man
  • Went to the MN State Fair (and saw 30 Seconds to Mars and Linkin Park in concert)
  • Started the third trimester
  • Had one last night on the town for my friend Gina before her wedding
  • Celebrated Oliver's 8th birthday 


  1. I've been thinking about you! Glad things are going well!

  2. So happy to hear that everything is going so wonderfully!